By Cathy Lebeaux, MA, MS, LPC, BC-DMT
I used to lead groups for children and was often asked, “can you teach empathy and compassion.” My answer was a resounding, “yes!” Rather than teaching an intellectual concept, which is much too abstract for children and people with communication and social difficulties, you offer them a practical experience that they can relate to. A situation where they experience through their bodies and minds, being in someone else’s shoes. Relatable Empathy.
What It’s Like to Be Blind: Embodying Blindness
A commonly used icebreaker or warm-up is String World. It simply involves throwing a ball of string or yarn across the circle. Group members are asked to catch the string, hold it in one hand, and then throw the string ball with the other hand to another group member. This is repeated until each group member is connected by the string. Sometimes people are asked to introduce themselves or learn other group members names by saying them as they throw the ball. Everyone is connected by the string. Usually, the process is then reversed throwing the string so that each person is no longer connected.
In my groups we went a step further, we used the unique web that was created by the string. I’d walk across the web (which was usually a few inches off the floor), stepping in the spaces that were created. Then I’d invite group members to take a safe risk and ty it. They would usually start going one at a time. I’d invite them to try it backwards, sideways, or with their eyes closed (with or without a guide helping them to get across the circle). Ideally, group members would come-up with their own ways to get across, sometimes asking people to raise the web and going under it, or going across with a partner or even once on all fours.
For many years I taught this exercise during Antioch’s Dance/Movement Therapy Intensive. With these adults, a discussion would follow around safe risk, perceived fear, anxiety, trust, and control. Students’ would often notice that others felt the same and had shared experiences.
Students’ would often notice that others felt the same and had shared experiences.
I also used this same exercise for latency-aged boys’ groups for kids with Asperger’s, learning difficulties, behavioral issues, and/or social and communication issues. One semester, my interns and I had a child join the group who was blind. He struggled with self-esteem, fitting in, behavioral issues, and making friends. After some discussion, we decided to try this common exercise with him.
We invited the boys to try the web with their eyes closed. Most did, some picking the group or a group member to guide them, some going it alone. They stumbled. They were slow. Some were nervous. Some were scared. The blind child waited until most of the group had gone. He stood-up, walked quickly across the circle and back without hesitation or tripping. When he sat down, the others’ boys clearly impressed, began asking him questions about how he had done it. He said that he had listened as each boy went and counted. He shared that he was not afraid because this was “normal” for him. The boys’ asked, and he shared what life as a blind person was like. He talked about feeling left out and angry, that he missed-out on sports and that he felt like the kids didn’t want to be his friends. The boys’ that went to his school told him that they did want to be his friend, but perceived him as being angry & not wanting friends.
I realized that not only was this an opportunity for him to feel successful, and best at something, but it was creating a dialogue. It was clearing-up misunderstandings and helping him and the other boys’ see things from each other’s point-of-view. This simple exercise, created a safe environment to learn about each other, and it gave these boys a hands-on experience of what life was like for blind people. My hope is that this experience created compassion and empathy that will carry-forward.
What if You Were No Longer Able-Bodied: Embodying Disability
Imagine you are working with caretakers, service providers, or family members of people with disabilities. Some helpers have great empathy and compassion, and some need a better understanding. For many of us, it’s hard to imagine what it would be like to no longer have control over our own body. To be dependent upon others. To watch other people do what we used to do. By giving caretakers’ a body-based experience of being disabled, you help them move past frustration, impatience or even fear, to understanding what it’s like to be in that situation. That creates empathy.
Freeze Dance is an easy-to-do activity involving turning on some great, group-appropriate music and asking people to dance or just move their bodies. You can also ask them to simply walk around the room. Then you have them freeze, they are completely paralyzed, unable to move anything. Then, they can only move their right side, left side, only their upper body, then only their hands, etc. At some point half the group is completely frozen, while the other half dances or walks around them, then you reverse the groups.
How did you feel? Was it frustrating or did it make you angry to be told how you could and couldn’t move your own body? Was it scary to be unable to move? How did it feel to be paralyzed, while others moved around you? Did you feel left out? Jealous? Afraid? How would you have wanted someone to treat you?
This exercise can be used to lead a discussion around stroke or accident survivors, or people who have diseases or genetic conditions. You can also extrapolate and modify the discussion for intellectual disabilities or for people marginalized in any way.
It is my belief that our bodies are great vessels for compassion and empathy. We all feel pain. We have all come up against our physical limitations. By using body-based creative approaches, reinforced by others in a group setting, we can teach relatable empathy, which I think is much more effective than words alone.
About the Author:
Cathy Lebeaux, MA, MS, LPC, BC-DMT, is a Board-Certified Dance/Movement Therapist as well as a Certified Archetype Consultant for Caroline Myss’ Sacred Contracts. She has a private practice in Mt. Pleasant, SC, the Psychotherapy & Expressive Arts Center, LLC, as well as being adjunct faculty for Antioch University NE. Read more about Cathy HERE.
